The guest roster at Curtain Call Playhouse’s California Suite. (Photos by Rebecca Ainer and Lauren Martino)
By Britin Haller
Produced by Curtain Call Playhouse, and written by the late great Neil Simon, California Suite is not a traditional play, but a series of four playlets revolving around guests in Suite 203/204 at the Beverly Hills Hotel.
Three of these vignettes are disappointments that don’t land at all, but one is the proverbial “diamond in the rough” that is worth the visit.
Set in the 1970s, California Suite is a sequel of sorts to Simon’s more successful Plaza Suite, which opened on Broadway in 1968 and ran for over 1000 performances. And after seeing Plaza Suite at another local theater last year, it’s easy to see why California Suite just didn’t match up, because while the laughs for Plaza Suite are a mile a minute, California Suite is just not that funny.
There was a time when Neil Simon comedies were woven into the fabric of American culture, dominating Broadway and Hollywood, and winning him Tonys, Golden Globes, Emmys, and Oscars. Simon’s dialogue shaped the way we talked, joked, and even understood relationships. Shows like Barefoot in the Park, The Odd Couple, and yes, Plaza Suite, secured his place as a true show-biz legend.
But if California Suite were the play Neil Simon had to be judged by, he wouldn’t deserve a Wikipedia page, let alone the reputation of an industry titan, because it reads like one soufflé and three half-baked ideas sent out into the world before they had time to marinate.
Just like Plaza Suite, each California Suite vignette is named for the location where the hotel guests are coming from. In PS, it is Mamaroneck, Hollywood, and Forest Hills. In CS, it’s New York, Philadelphia, London, and Chicago. And in both, the “visitors” to the hotels have brought lots of baggage with them, and we’re not talking about suitcases.
We open on “Visitor from New York,” where Hannah, a hardened NYC business woman wearing pantyhose (GASP!), is meeting with her ex-husband, Billy. Billy is now a Californian through and through, a laid-back personable dude who doesn’t wear socks. Hannah (Leslie Kandel) is annoyed by this new version of Billy (J. Paul Heiner), but even more annoyed that their teenage daughter now wants to live with her dad full-time on the West Coast.
Listening to a bitter woman nag at her ex is neither cute nor amusing, and it’s hard to muster up any concern for an off-stage daughter. If this couple ever had any romantic chemistry, they certainly don’t now, and by the time, Hannah starts to mellow, we just don’t care anymore. If we ever did.
Next up is “Visitor from Philadelphia,” where a married man named Marvin (Rick Prada) with no apparent motivation for cheating on his wife, and no actual memory of doing it, wakes up next to a passed-out prostitute that Marvin’s brother sent him as a gift. Marvin’s wife, Millie (Lisa Kerr) is due to arrive any minute, and Marvin is understandably frantic to get this working girl out of his bed before all hell breaks loose. We’re just going to say it … Prada is a fine actor, but facts are facts, he appears older than this role calls for.
Marvin is written as a middle-aged man whose impulsive choices, and frantic attempts at concealment of the woman in his bed, create a farcical energy. The dialogue even mentions Marvin as being middle-aged. But when Marvin is dressed like he just finished the early-bird special and tottered off to beddy bye, we can’t help but wonder, can we get this guy a nice pair of silk pajamas, for goodness sake?
Also, and this is on Neil Simon, this guy just slept with a prostitute because his brother sent him one? Eww …no …
We were sure the punchline was going to be that the pro (a comatose Katie Jackson) wakes up and tells Millie that Marvin fell asleep after they had a few drinks and that nothing sexual happened because he kept talking about how much his family meant to him. Now, that would have been funny.
The third skit, and the best in our opinion, is “Visitors from London,” starring Curtain Call Playhouse’s founder Kris Coffelt as Diana with Michael Schenker as Sidney. Widely considered to be the crowning achievement of California Suite, this is the story of an insecure movie actress and her closeted gay husband. Here the humor is real, not slapstick, and the material is heavy, but also filled with real emotion, and love.
It’s the evening of the Oscars, and Diana and Sidney are getting dressed. Diana has been nominated for Best Actress and hates the dress she is wearing, a running gag which really is clever. Sidney is supportive while his nervous wife falls apart around him.
Flash forward to their return after the ceremony which didn’t go the way Diana had hoped for more than one reason. As her years and years of pent-up aggression towards Sidney’s “secret” lifestyle comes out, a husband and wife must come to terms with each other.
It’s a bittersweet, lovely, raw, and emotional scene (Maggie Smith as Diana won the Oscar in the film version), and the heart of California Suite. Coffelt and the very handsome Schenker nail it.
The last vignette is called “Visitors from Chicago,” and tells the story of what happens when two couples who are frequent travelers together play tennis and one hurts her ankle on the court.
J. Paul Heiner and Michael Schenker pull most of the weight here as the bickering “friends” Mort and Stu. Katie Jackson and Brooke Lynn White are the wives who don’t get to do much except watch the drama unfold, although White does have a couple of cute moments as the hypochondriac and drama queen Gert. Maneuvering Mort’s injured spouse to the bed, and the insanity that ensues when Mort and Stu come to blows, are amusing bits.
But why Simon chose to close California Suite with a farce that’s not that funny is a subject worthy of debate. Because as it is, when “Visitors from Chicago,” ends, and the lights go up, we are left wondering what just happened. More about that in a minute.
Now about the hotel room that is supposed to be fitting of a 1976 five-star Beverly Hills Hotel suite, but looks more like a budget motel on the wrong exit. Look, we know that the Willow Theatre is not a home base for Curtain Call Playhouse, and so, we want to go easy on them. The tasteful yellow set is punctuated with white trim, and an ornate column that stands as a pretend doorway between the bedroom and the living room.
It’s the set dressing we aren’t thrilled with, specifically the long drab curtains which are never opened and flatten every scene’s spirit, and the bed that looks like it came from a childhood nursery. At times, more than one person has to get on that teeny tiny mattress, taking us out of the action and into our own shaking heads. The rest of the furniture is not what we would call five-star either, rather Aunt Edna’s estate sale appropriate, but even though we must mention it, we will overlook it, because …budget.
What we can’t overlook is the multitude of times actors broke the “invisible” wall between the living room area and the bedroom, a boundary already established in “A Visitor from New York.” Director Carla Zackson Heller can’t have it both ways, so please, we beg you, pick one and stick with it.
An issue with the script is that room service never shows up for a simple drink order, or ice for an injured ankle. The Beverly Hills Hotel can’t have been too thrilled with that. And between the nonexistent bellboy, room service, and turndown service, the bustling hotel-comedy charm seen in Plaza Suite is nonexistent here.
If the Beverly Hills Hotel actually looked and operated like this, we wouldn’t leave them a negative Yelp review, we’d file a complaint with the Better Business Bureau.
For the most part, the lighting is consistent, with a light switch adding a nice touch. The sound is fine, except for when off-stage action is taking place in the bathroom, and the mics get muffled, most obviously when Diana is changing out of THAT dress.
Another problem, as we see it, is that there is no constant theme between the stories or anything to tie them together. Neil Simon is considered a master of American comedy, and who are we to question his judgement, but we have questions like where is the cohesiveness you gave us with the bellboy as a running theme in Plaza Suite?
And why, oh why, did you think closing the show on the least poignant of the playlets was the way to go, because trust us, it wasn’t. California Suite doesn’t have an ending, rather it just ends. As a result, we feel nothing; no catharsis, no warmth, not even a big laugh to see us through the shock of the sudden blackout, curtain call, and blaring house lights.
But look, almost all of our issues with California Suite are in the script, and we don’t want to penalize the hard-working and talented individuals from Curtain Call Playhouse for Neil Simon’s inadequacies. So go see it, not just so you can say you saw Neil Simon at his worst, but because local theatre is counting on you for its support.
Small companies like Curtain Call Playhouse survive on shows like these, when one flawless vignette like “Visitors From London” makes you believe that the whole art form is still worth fighting for. And not only is that perfect scene worth the price of admission alone, it’s one we will reflect on and remember fondly.
California Suite from Curtain Call Playhouse runs through November 23 at the Willow Theatre at the Sugar Sand Park Community Center, 300 S. Military Trail, Boca Raton; 7 p.m. Friday and Saturday; 1 p.m. Saturday and Sunday. Running time approx. 135 minutes includes a 15-minute intermission. Tickets $25, or $20 for a group of four or more. Call the box office at 561-347-3948 or visit curtaincallplayhouse.com.
Britin Haller is a journalist, editor-for-hire, and an author who serves on the board of directors for the Mystery Writers of America Florida Chapter. As a celebrity wrangler, Brit regularly rubbed elbows with movie stars, sports stars, and rock stars, and as a media escort, she toured with New York Times bestselling authors. After appearing in several local musicals and all-state choir, Britin studied theater at Indiana University (a Big 10 college) and the University of Evansville (Rami Malek’s alma mater).
Kris Coffelt and Michael Schenker in “Visitors From London”
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